PART 21-HOW CRAZY ARE YOU? This part goes with PART 18 & 20, so you might want to read them in order before this one. First, the points in this are BAD. The more you have, you more insane you are. There is a possible 40 points. Got that? Points; BAD. Okay, for every question answered C, give yourself a point. For every D, give yourself 2 points. If you answered any with E, see the PYRO section at the end. Here we go! 0 POINTS You've passed with no errors! Congratulations, you're perfectly sane. (You only read this because someone told you to, isn't that right?) 1-5 POINTS I guess you'd be considered the average person. You're probably only about 1-10% insane. 6-10 POINTS You're either experiencing a little brain damage, or they failed your lobotomy. 11-20 POINTS Do the words, "Funny Farm" mean anything to you? 21-39 POINTS I suspect you've modeled your life after your hero, Dil. 40 POINTS You've lived with your mother your whole life, haven't you? PYRO YOU NEVER THOUGHT ANYONE WOULD LEARN ABOUT THAT LATE NIGHT ARSON RUN, RIGHT? I ONLY HAVE ONE THING TO SAY TO YOU. CAN YOU TORCH MY NEIGHBOR'S GARAGE? HE TICKED ME OFF YESTERDAY. PART 22-INVENTOR Dil Dil was found in Missouri and adopted by a family of imported wombats. Mommy wombat (Hum) and Daddy wombat (Ho-Hum) were nice, but it was time for Dil to set off and have a family himself. They said goodbye. They told him what to do when certain things happened. They gave him their leftover garbage. It should last him about a day. Wait a minute! This sounds either like a NATURE special, or a Disney movie! WE GOTS TA FEEX EET! PART 22-INVENTOR Dil TAKE: 2 Dil was found in Missouri and adopted by a family of scorpions. When the scorpions weren't hunting for food or sleeping, they were enjoying quality time with Dil by stinging him. Finally Dil got mad and ate Mommy scorpion. Daddy scorpion got mad and whipped Dil's butt. Then Daddy scorpion sent Dil to BOBTOWN. That is, after he took his Peanut Butter bazooka out on him. Dil felt full. When Dil got to BOBTOWN, he stopped at Bob's Coka-Cola Warehouse and had him a nice rat. Dil felt bloated. So Dil went to Bob's Inn and slept. That night, the Innkeeper came to Dil's room. He was Poof the vampire. Poof hates crosses, and water, and torches, and stakes, and women named Buffy. And especially? Light! The worst enemy of all! Poof was hungry. Dil was fat. So Poof bite Dil. Poof felt rabid. Poof felt the rabid ofness. So Poof used the ofness and exploded. Dil woke up. He found vampire guts everywhere. So, to solve his problem, he invented the Nosesucker. And Dil sucked up the snotty Poof nose. Suddenly Mr. Muffy appeared. Muffy said to leave, because his old enemies found where he is and are after him. Yep, it's Fan the fan, and Peanut Butter. PART 231/3-THE REUNION (a long awaited part!) Uh-oh! It's finally come. And I thought it never would. The final showdown. In this corner, it's the majorly oversized Cowman. And in this corner, is Dil to defend his championshipness. And there's the bell. The match starts! Just then Mr. Muffy slaps Dil. "Wake up, Dil! They're here!" So both Dil and Mr. Muffy used the isness. But Fan and Peanut Butter have a new weapon. Now they know the ofness, the other power of insanity. And Fan used the ofness and revived Poof the vampire. Now it's looking bad for Dil. But he still has one more friend to rely on. Dil used the isness and summoned his first friend, who was still waiting at the airport. And in came Fur the vole. Now Dil finally has a fair fight. But Fur didn't know the isness, so Dil bit him. Now they all know the isness. But Fan the fan, Peanut Butter, and Poof all know the ofness. So they pared off. Fur got Poof, Mr. Muffy got Fan the fan, and Dil got Peanut Butter. This ought to be good. Ya know, 'cause Dil hates Peanut Butter and being sticky! How funny! ROUND 1-FUR VS. POOF Fur used the isness and turned Poof's ofness into unness, which is the opposite of any ness. Then Fur whacked Poof with a banana seed. But Poof's not done yet! Poof bit the ceiling, which bit the wall, which chunked a quail into Fur's bed, deleting the thought of ever having a diamond trash can. But wait! Fur countered with a bologna and cheese sandwich! Oops! Poof's been KOed! Fur wins! ROUND 2-Mr. Muffy VS. Fan the fan Fan the fan began to blow on Mr. Muffy. But Muffy ain't dumb. So he used his X-ray eyes and zapped Fan's motor. Fan exploded! No! There's Fan there! Muffy killed Fan's brother, Fanny! Mr. Muffy wins! ROUND 3-Dil VS. Peanut Butter Peanut Butter jumped on Dil, making him sticky. More than anything, Dil hates being sticky! Then Peanut Butter used the ofness! No! So many Peanutbutterians! Then Dil used the forbidden hidden isness technique. The terrific Summon Reindeer! The reindeer were used to eating sand, but they settled for the Peanutbutterians. They ate them all! But wait! They ate Dil too! Peanut Butter wins! PART 24-A REINDEERS INSIDES I guess now we know why that was the forbidden isness move, don't we? Well, Dil's inside a reindeer now. Oh, by the way, Dil hates anything that starts with a number or with the letters A through Z. In case you didn't know. Okay, I'm just gonna be brief with this. Dil got swallowed, Dil reentered the world, somehow, and, the end. PART 25-THE BARRIER Then Dil looked around and saw that Mr. Muffy and Fur had also been eaten by Reindeer. He also saw that he was not in BOBTOWN any more. Instead, they found themselves in Starweed Land! Fur remembered his pyramid, so they slept in it all day. Then they got up at the crack of dusk. Dil knew this place. It was the home of the Starweeds. And Dil wanted out as soon as possible! So Dil and Muffy and Fur ran to the border. Dil splatted on the air. Then Mr. Muffy splatted on the air. Then Fur tripped over his tongue after seeing the delicious Salami-is-better-than-Summer-Sausage plant. Dil looked up and saw that he didn't run into the air, it was a forcefield. The legendary forcefield built by the ancient Starweeds. It was called, the "Whacker." Needless to say, Whacker whacked Dil. Dil felt like a drunken mosquito on a cold, dark morning. Dil had a serious hangover. Just then, Fur sat on Gopher. Gopher bit Dil. Dil whacked himself with a dime. Dil fell into a Peanut Butter Pit left from the last time the Peanutbutterians tried to take over the world. Oh, Mr. Muffy fell in too. PART 26-THE UNDERGROUND When Dil and Mr. Muffy got to the end of the Peanut Butter Pit, they fell into a giant underground cavern. Inside the cavern lived? Gopher! Gopher is part of the Peanut Butter/Fan the fan/Poof/Gopher axis. Dil is part of the Underwear Collectors Club. Mr. Muffy is part of the government conspiracy to never let the Lions win the Super Bowl. Gopher whistled. Out popped Gofur, then Goopher, then Golfer. Gopher scratched Dil. Then Gofur bit Dil. Then Goopher yoked Dil. Then Golfer whacked Dil with a 9-iron. Whack! Whack! Whack! All of the sudden! No! It's? Lil the bunny assassin! Lil whacked Dil with her bazooka. Then Lil blasted Dil with her bazooka. Then Lil zapped Dil with a plug-in. Dil saw triple. Then Lil bit Dil's foot. Dil exploded! No, that was the Dil balloon! Then Mr. Muffy asked Lil, "Do you jiggle when you wiggle?" Mr. Muffy was slapped so hard he began to orbit the Earth. Then Lil shot him back down. And again, they ended up in the Starweed Lands. PART 27-THE STARWEEDS Gopher got worried about his magic can-opener, so he went home. Gofur, Goofur, and Golfer followed him. BOOM!!! There was a hole in the ceiling! And down dropped? Grandpa the Weedseed Starweed, Kitchen the Cookweed Starweed, and Cram the Upland Starweed. Grandpa stared at Dil. Dil stared at Grandpa. Grandpa whacked Dil with his cane. Then Cram threw Dil in Kitchen's stew pot. So Kitchen added onions, and radishes, and carrots, and celery, and mannaise, and Peanut Butter to the stew. It was nice and thick. Just like Dil doesn't like it. Then Mr. Muffy shot Kitchen with his isness. Kitchen exploded. Oh, no! The stew was ruined! Then Mr. Muffy shot the pot with his laser eyes. The ground under it burst to flames. Dil felt Turkish. Just like a turkey! Amazing! Then the underground sewer water knocked out Dil, and Mr. Muffy, and Fur. When they woke up, they were in the middle of the Starweed town, Happynoodle. They were hanging from ropes from the tree in the middle of Happynoodle. Underneath them was a bed of noodles. And behind them was the dreaded Squiggle machine. Then Grandpa came up and told them, "A wise Starweed once told me that life is a thing of wonder. It can be great or sad, large or small, peaceful or painful. It can be manipulated to nearly any shape, and yet it is quick to vanish. And so shall you be, Dil." Then Mr. Muffy blew up Grandpa with the isness. Then Dil summoned the Starweed's worst enemy. And in ran Nahooiwa the Japanman. Nahooiwa picked up the Starweeds and ate them all. All except the ones that didn't live there and Cram the Upland Starweed. It wasn't seaweed, but it was okay. So Cram pleaded with Dil to let him live. So Cram is now on Dil's side! Then Nahooiwa burped so hard the Starweed Barrier, Whacker, imploded. And Dil tripped on a stone. That sent them all but Nahooiwa to an unknown place. PART 28-A NEW FRIEND, A NEW ENEMY When Mr. Muffy looked around, he found that they were in the middle of Kuvoorkee-N, Mr. Muffy's home city. There wasn't anyone left in the city. They apparently killed themselves. But wait! There in the middle of the street! It's Bobby the Ninjaman. He's fighting Crap the dung pile. Then Bobby's star pierced the pile of dung known as Crap. Then the star stuck in Dil. Dil got flushed. He bit Bobby. Bobby bit Cram. Now Bobby and Cram the Upland Starweed know the isness. So Bobby's with Dil. Suddenly out jumped Kuvoorkee-N, the founder of the city of Kuvoorkee-N. Oh, no! Kuvoorkee-N knows the ofness! He must be against Dil, too! Then Kuvoorkee-N threw Syringe at Dil. Dil was intoxicated. He got into a big bar fight and had to have a tetanus and rabies shot because a weird old man bit him. Then Bobby ran him through with a sword. So Kuvoorkee-N used the ofness and killed an ant to regenerate himself. The killer! Kuvoorkee-N knew he was beat, so he flew away with an umbrella. PART 29-THE RULER OF THE WORLD Suddenly Danables came and took over the world. The End. PART 30-THE SIX KINGDOMS Danables divided the world into six parts; West Asia, East Asia and Europe, Africa, Oceania, Chicago, and the rest of the world. He called them, respectively; Wesia, Easope, Malaria Zone, Broken Lands, Capitol of the World, and Threst. Respectively, the following people became the rulers of their lands; Pelzak the Pyromaniac, Poof the Vampire, Fan the fan, Seaweed the Weedseed Starweed, Danables, and Peanut Butter. Dil's group, now calling themselves the Isnessians, decided to split their forces to defeat the awful Ofnessians, or, Peanut Butter's group. Dil went to the Threst, Mr. Muffy went to the Capitol of the World, Fur went to Easope, Cram went to the Broken Lands, Bobby went to Malaria Zone, and Pelzak burned down Wesia before his first day was over.